Forget the paps, mooching hangers-ons and rehab, the real price of being a celeb spawn is the... ah... memorable name you’ll no doubt be dumped with given. From the trippy (Moon Unit Zappa), to the literal (adding the ‘y’ to Kyd Duchovny’s name apparently makes it origynal instead of idyotyc) to the downright silly (sorry Pilot Inspektor, your name kinda sounds like a pen), giving your child a name that will become the ultimate in Bogan breeding, is today’s celeb trick du jour.
And in 2009, the standout was the naming of Nicole Richie and Joel Madden’s second offspring, Sparrow James Midnight Madden- because naming your child after a non-descript, brown bird gives your child such a great start to life. Joel told Britain's OK! magazine, "It reminded me of the Johnny Cash song A Boy Named Sue. My worry raising a son in Hollywood is, what will he have to struggle for? I wanted to give him a name that he's going to have to stand up for. I love it." Trend alert! Giving your kid a name that will help him get the crap beat out of him on the playground to help build his character. Call us crazy, but we think that just surviving puberty provides enough character building for any kid. Or Kyd.