According to an Astrologer, Understanding Your Partner’s Natal Chart Is Better Than Any Love Language

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When it comes to astrology, I’m no expert. I’ve always loved the concept of astrology and actually can’t deny how much stake the universe and natural elements have in who we are.

So, when Astrologer Kristy Gray told me that understanding my boyfriend’s natal chart is actually better than any love language, I couldn’t resist.

COVID lockdowns have been hard on so many relationships. I feel really lucky as my boyfriend and I have really grown stronger and learnt heaps about each other during this time, but we’ve definitely had some moments of conflict that I think were exacerbated due to the lockdown environment.

That being said, communicating with your partner is so important. You can never know too much about how to communicate best, when it comes to any type of relationship, whether that be a friendship, a long-term partner or even someone you’ve just started dating.

Understanding each other’s natal chart is a good way to get a deeper understanding of what you both want out of your relationship. So, whether you’re single, looking for “the one”, in a long-term relationship struggling with moments of conflict, or just want to understand yourself and someone else better, Kristy is here to explain how our natal charts can help.

What Is a Natal Chart?

A Natal Chart is a celestial map providing a snapshot of the planets, movement of the zodiac and astrological aspects at the date, time and place you were born. Think of it as the Celestial Blueprint for who you are.

  • Each Planet represents a different set of qualities and characteristics, each ruling over a different part of your life.
  • Each Zodiac Sign represents an individual’s approach to life, and how they express their thoughts, feelings, and actions.
  • Each House represents a different part of your life such as relationships, transformation, and career.

When you look at all these parts as a whole, and how the planets connect through aspects (the distance between planets and the energy that flows between them), you gain a 360-degree view of your soul.

How to Work Out You (Or Your Partner’s) Natal Chart

To work out your Natal Chart, you’ll need your date of birth, time of birth and birth city. It’s important to have these details, as a Natal Chart moves approximately every four minutes, so it’s time to give Mum a call if you don’t have these details or dig out your birth certificate. If either isn’t an option, you can work with an Astrologer on a birth time rectification using major life events to find a probable time of birth.

Once you have all the important details you can head to a website like and cast yours and your partner’s Natal Chart.

Why the Natal Chart Is Better Than Any Love Language

Your Natal Chart acts as a lens allowing you to see the multi-faceted parts of who you are. Rather than seeing who and how you are in a relationship as one dimensional, astrology gives you multiple dimensions to explore. 

For example, what first attracts you to someone? Is it their looks, personality, or humility? The planet Mars will give you insight into this. Mars represents action, assertion, and your lust for life, but it also represents your sexual attraction to others. This information can be invaluable when you’re single, as it helps you to identify what first creates that spark. In a relationship, it gives you clues on how you can reignite the flame when needed.

Every Chart Is Different

The planet Venus acts as your love language. Most of the time I see similarities between a Venus placement in a Natal Chart and results from the 5 Love Language Quiz.

Venus represents how you relate to people and your environment. This planet reveals your expectations within relationships and what gives you pleasure. For example, if you have Venus in Scorpio, you’ll crave deep passion and intensity in relationships. However, if you have Venus in Virgo, you’ll prefer someone that’s considerate and love is expressed through practical gestures.

No relationship will stand the test of time without great communication. The planet Mercury is linked to your thoughts and the way your mind works, it’s how you’re going to show up and express yourself. For example, if you have Mercury in Taurus, you’ll be deliberate in how you communicate and you’re bound to think things through first, whereas if your partner has Mercury in Aries, they’ll be prone towards more spontaneity with their thinking and are, at times, potentially impatient. When you know this, it creates an understanding within the relationship and you can work on meeting each other halfway.

Lastly, I can’t leave out the other two important pieces of this puzzle; the luminaries, Sun, and Moon. Your Sun is the CEO of you and it represents where you’re destined to shine in life. The Moon represents your basic needs and what you require to feel safe and secure. These help to shed light on compatibility and how you can both move in the same direction as a team.

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