Oh, hey there self-sabotager! Okay, we're all guilty of making life hard for ourselves at times, but sometimes it's hard to pinpoint exactly what we're doing that's keeping us so down. It could be your mental habits. The stuff you tell yourself and can have a profound effect on your outlook and sense of wellbeing. So if it isn't good for you, stop doing it.
Here are five things to quit right now.
- Living in the past. Life moves on and things are different now, accept it. You're selling yourself and your life short if you refuse to move on. It's okay to reminisce but don't spend all your time thinking and talking about how things were. Find happiness in your present and make plans for your future.
- Fearing change. Helen Steed, the creative director of Glossier has a 10-step How to Work Better board hanging in her studio, and step eight says "accept change as inevitable". These are smart words to work by, but also to live by. The familiar is comfortable but things are always going to change, and if you fear it, you're always going to suffer. Learn to see change as a good thing. It brings opportunities and growth. All good things.
- Over-thinking everything. This is a hard one to stop your self from doing, but replaying a conversation over and over in your head, or obsessing over something someone has done isn't healthy. Sometimes people just say and act without considering you. If you're prone to the other kind of over-thinking, the kind that stops you making decisions, try to wean yourself off analysing every possibility. Start small, like on your breakfast order, and try to trust your instincts more. There's no point getting anxious over eggs.
- Trying to please everyone. It's impossible, so stop trying. Focus on making yourself happy and the others will follow.
- Putting yourself down. If you tell yourself something enough, you'll start believing it's true, and then it will become your crazed reality. Stop knocking yourself. Instead, do things you can feel proud of yourself for and remember that self love is a powerful thing. Embrace it.
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